Mamás have a lot on their plates, and their dedication is commendable. Whether stay-at-home or working moms, they constantly juggle a never-ending to-do list. For some, that also includes juggling their husband’s family as well.

But one mom on TikTok spoke out against the double standard that sees wives as their husbands’ “kin keepers.”

The TikToker addressed how acting as the ‘Kin Keeper’ for the husband’s family adds to a wife’s mental load 

Morgan Elisa Strickell discusses how her mother-in-law called her son and daughter-in-law to express her feelings about their lack of communication. Strickell reveals that her mother-in-law “was hurt” about finding out information from a third party about their pregnancy.

Strickell explains she was surprised to hear this as she thought her husband had been communicating the information to her mother-in-law. According to the TikToker, her husband believes it isn’t such a big deal for her to tell his family everything. 

She also details that she refused to take on that added responsibility, citing that it’s her husband’s job to inform his family while she informs her own. She notes that if roles were reversed, her husband wouldn’t be expected to relay information to her mother.

Many moms on social media agreed with Strickell, commenting that it was the husband’s duty to maintain relationships with their families

Women flocked to the comments section to offer their thoughts on the topic, many agreeing with Strickell’s sentiments. 

“My mom is my dad’s kin keeper of 30 yrs. This resulted in my mom having to split her time between taking care of his parents (who were having issues but overall well), vs taking care of her dying mom,” one person commented on TikTok.

Another said, “If he thinks it’s not much work for you …it shouldn’t be much work for him.”

Under an Instagram post for MOTHERLY on the topic, many women also agreed with Strickell.

One person said, “I love how we are rejecting the emotional and mental labour. Reality is, we have jobs and are carrying a lot at home. Enough is enough. The men must learn how to manage their own close relationships. It’s a HUMAN skill.”

But only some were on the same page.

“It is our responsibility to honor our mother and father and it is my role to be my husband’s helpmate in life. I am his partner and his strengths are not mine and my strengths are not his. So if that means I can help him honor his parents by scheduling time or seeing them, then I will gladly do that to be the best wife for my husband. And he will do his strengths for our family to be the best husband for me,” another Instagram commenter noted.